Ok, I'm Starting to Freak...

I can't put my finger on it. But in the last week, I've suddenly started to freak out about the economy. Suddenly I'm convinced we're in for years and years of pain, and Mr. Lacy and I will be lucky to keep either of our jobs, our house, our car....wait....we have a shitty car that's paid off. Still, that's the kind of irrational panic I'm talking about.

OK, so why wasn't I more panicked, say, when the rest of the world was? It's the difference between clinically as a reporter seeing how bad things were likely to get and processing the panic on an emotional level. Plus, as a business reporter I can't really invest in individual stocks, so the Wall Street stuff wasn't hitting home the same way. And we have a pretty sane mortgage on a house that according to recent comps hasn't deteriorated in value since we bought it. And as a contractor, I have some idea of what I'm making through the next year, barring any huge tragedies. Also, as a contractor, my revenues are pretty diversified between a few sources. I could lose one of my jobs and it'd be rough, but still be OK. And frankly, having weathered the dot com bust in San Francisco at a time when Mr. Lacy and I were far more junior in our careers and unconnected in the Valley, I felt like it might not be pleasant but we *could* weather anything. And if we did, hey, we'd be better off on the other side. Volatility equals opportunity right? Plus, I have a few cool new projects I'm working on that generally have me super upbeat.

Did something happen to cause this sudden change? Not really. In fact, Mr. Lacy avoided any layoffs (unless things get far worse) and I avoided one at Yahoo (ditto previous parenthetical) and got my BW contract renewed. (They have a fetish for late columns perhaps?) Maybe it was seeing so much other carnage around me, as thousands of others lost their jobs last week, but I've somehow lost the ability to be rational about it all. Hey, isn't that a sign of a bottom? Please? I had such a mini-meltdown midday that Geoff sent me this:

Elsewhere in the world of cute animals, this site is the only thing that cheered me up amid my odd Wednesday economic panic. Isn't it funny how a down economy makes us so cynical that the animal-picture-meme-du-jour has even turned in angrily on itself? Whoever writes that blog, you're my new recession buddy. Please keep posting pictures of animals trying too hard to look cute and mocking them so I can make it on days like today.