Um, Gym Time Anyone?

I went on Flickr to find a picture of me giving a keynote for the speaker tab I'm about to add to the blog. (Yes, having conquered all that keynote angst, I am for hire!) Apparently, I've never searched my name on Flickr and was stunned to see so many pictures from the book tour that I'd never seen. It was actually a nice walk down memory lane. We're so nostalgic, Olivia is going to pull a few for a post later today.

I also came across this one by Thomas Hawk and suddenly, viscerally remembered how much MORE I worked and stressed out when I was on staff at BusinessWeek. This was right after my Digg cover that sucked up six grueling months of my life--including weekends and evenings-- and almost didn't even run. When it did run, it was my first big controversy, and I had no idea how to handle it. All I wanted to do was hide under a bed. It was just before the book deal that changed my life. It was a period when I wasn't eating (clearly!) or sleeping and actually started running to stay sane. I was barely in my 30s, depressed about the state of magazines and trying to figure out what the hell to do with the rest of my career. I honestly didn't know if I could even be a reporter still and be happy or if all those jobs were just gone.

It reminded me of Jason's now much written about (and somewhat mocked) Startup Depression post. This was my period where my ass was getting kicked-- the point when it was, as he says and the awful cliche goes, darkest before the dawn. It was the time I could have just given up and, I don't know, gone into PR or had some babies. (Stop laughing, Olivia.) There was no way for me to know how much my life would change in just two years. I should remember this time every time I feel overworked, because I'm really amazingly lucky. (Or maybe good...? Groan, sorry.) I don't know many reporters who have as great of a life as I do right now.

Also, um, I know it's a wide angle lens and an artsy shot, but I don't remember ever being that skinny!
I'm going to the gym now. (Such a girl, I know.) After the gym, less sap. Really.

Comments

[everythingsteve.com]

I think you look pretty darned good in that photo Sarah, although I'll concede your arms looked a bit twiggish and needed more definition. Thanks goodness you didn't end up settling and....horror of horrors...going into PR! Come on...it's not that bad (although admittedly I'm not in PR myself anymore). BTW, lest you think I'm being critical, I love how willing you are to share your candid and personal thoughts on this blog. Refreshing.

[Michael Biddulph]

God...you were very tiny back then. Great that things are going better (healthier) for you.

[Cate]

Such a fantastic post. Yeah, I feel like I'm sort of in that dark, scary place where everything is up in the air...and while I couldn't quite connect with everything in Jason's depression post, a lot of it rang true.

I wish more successful people (and especially women) would share about their rise to success. I think it would be really comforting to those of us who are in that sea of the unknown.